Psychologist Gerald A. Solfanelli


To listen to my guided / SELF-MEDITATION exercise, verify agreement with disclaimers and click the "play button" below:

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The following simple, self-meditation technique is effective for helping manage daily stress. Allow 4-5 minutes in a quiet area to fully enjoy this exercise. You can begin by memorizing some of the questions below & asking them to yourself with your eyes closed. You can have a friend ask them to you. Or, you can read the questions into a tape player and follow along during playback.

As you get comfortable in your seat, allow yourself to use your “inner eye” to find the most disturbing body sensation you may feel (an ache, pain, etc.). Concentrate on this area, while identifying the following:

“If that disturbing body sensation were to have a ____(a - f) what would it be?

a) shape d) temperature
b) size e) texture
c) color f) sound

Next, identify: “What is your favorite color you associate with healing?”

Finally, imagine that this favorite colored healing light is coming in through the top of your head and directing itself at the shape in your body. Let’s pretend that the source of this light is the cosmos or universe, so that the more you use, the more and more you have available. THE LIGHT DIRECTS ITSELF AT THE SHAPE AND PENETRATES, PERMEATES, RESONATES, AND VIBRATES, IN AND AROUND IT. AND AS IT DOES, WHAT HAPPENS TO THE SHAPE?

If you notice that the shape changes in any way, continue repeating the capitalized portion, until the shape is completely gone. At this point, allow the light to easily and gently come into every portion of your body, while giving yourself the positive suggestion for peace and calm. Allow yourself to become awake and aware at the count of five.

This exercise was adapted from Dr. Francine Shapiro’s “light-stream technique” from "EMDR", © Harpercollins; 1st ed edition (April 1, 1995).


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The following questions are designed to help ad balance to our lives. It is easy to focus upon the challenges in our lives. Forcing ourselves to be able to recognize those things which are still O.K. in our lives helps us to maintain balance. Although initial attempts may prove difficult, answer each question as fully as possible. If you find it too difficult to answer each question as it is stated, reword the beginning of the question to read: “What could I be...” Allow yourself to truly feel the feelings that the answer to each question provides.

1. What am I happy about in my life right now?
What about that makes me happy?
How does that make me feel?

2. What am I excited about in my life right now?
What about that makes me excited?
How does that make me feel?

3. What am I proud of in my life right now?
What about that makes me proud?
How does that make me feel?

4. What am I grateful for in my life right now?
What about that makes me grateful?
How does that make me feel?

5. What am I enjoying most in my life right now?
What about that do I enjoy?
How does that make me feel?

6. What am I committed to in my life right now?
What about that makes me committed?
How does that make me feel?

7. Who do I love? Who loves me?
What about that makes me loving?
How does that make me feel?

Adapted from Anthony Robbins’ "Notes From a Friend", © Fireside;
Reprint edition (August 1, 1995).


Emotional Wealth: How Emotional Health Affects Overall Health


Acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation--some fact of my life--unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity or peace until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in this world by mistake. Until I can accept my situation, I can not deal with it effectively. Unless I accept life on life’s terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes.

Shakespeare said, “All the world’s a stage, all the men and women merely players.” He forgot to mention that often times I was the chief critic. I was always able to see the flaw in every person, every situation. And I was always glad to point it out, because I knew you wanted perfection, just as I did. Acceptance, however, has taught me that there is a bit of good in the worst of us and a bit of bad in the best of us; that we are all children of God and we each have a right to be here. When I complain about me or about you, I am complaining about God’s handiwork. I am saying that I know better than God.

This passage was adapted from "Alcoholics Anonymous" (© Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc., New York City, 1988, pg. 449.)

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Site last updated February 8, 2009.